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We Need Better Women


  • We Need Better Women

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    I just can't get her to "move / respond" like the pros ...

    "Dear Edie,

    I've been taking a lot of lessons lately, and have now been to a few Salsa congresses. To tell you the truth, I wish the women in my town would invest the time and effort it takes to get better at Salsa dancing. I'm finding that the better I get, the more frustrated I am with the women I dance with in my town. They just don't seem to "get it" that the women we love dancing with have speed, balance and control. These girls make "us" men look and feel amazing, and in turn, we get better at leading. I get tired of having to hold women up, support their weight, keep them in line, and worry about them falling all the time.

    A lot of women just want to style, with absolutely zero foundation. (balance, speed, control). I'm to the point of where I am willing to PAY for their lessons just to be able to dance with someone that can dance like other women in other cities.

    I feel frustrated because some have speed, others have styling, and others have control - but they just don't seem to "get" that we as men, need to HAVE IT ALL in ONE PACKAGE!

    Can you give more workshops on how to get these women up-to-speed on what we need and want out there?

    - Frustrated Male Salsero.

    • ediester
      ediester commented
      Editing a comment
      Dear Frustrated,

      I would recommend asking one of your local female instructors or a person who is amazing to dance with, to give a "Techniques" workshop for women only. Let the guys in free (to encourage them to bring or pay for their girl.)

      This type of workshop should minimize the styling aspect, and focus on what men want in a follow. Make it short, and be sure to have one-on-one time with every individual girl, so she can feel how the pro feels, versus how she feels. This can be done by the pro leading her, then having her do basics (pretending to be the man), and the pro demonstrating how a pro feels to be lead, and then how the woman feels to be lead.

      This "feeling" can only be conveyed kinesthetically - by a "feeling" of the lead. There are very few words, or shall I say, there are no amount of "words" that can explain (thoroughly) the "feeling" the man needs from his follower. This can be done by doing a comparison of both. The Pro's following techniques, and the Amateur's following techniques. You will need the pro to be able to discern the difference between the two, and demonstrate it during a basic, and then a cross-body-lead (CBL). This way, the amateur will fully understand what she needs to do to get up-to-speed to what he wants (his standards, now raised to due dancing with pros at congresses).

      It's difficult to go back to an amateur once you've danced with some of the best of the best out there. The same holds true for women. Once they've felt the lead of an awesome Pro dancer, going back to their "regulars" in their towns can be dis-heartening to say the least.

      That is why it is extremely important to encourage your friends to take private lessons, and classes. Encourage them to support their local Salsa congresses, and "Dance" with people who are better than them. This will only enhance your Salsa experience out there to places you've never been. There is nothing more incredible than dancing with someone who's got it "all" - balance, speed, and control - from both a male AND female perspective. It can, and "will" happen, with the right attitude and love from the heart.

      Pay for her to go to these classes.
      You'll be doing this for "YOU". .

      - Edie, The Salsa FREAK!!
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